Chapter 7 Law & Order

I have seen angels dance. I have seen men dance as angels. There is Holy Spirit inspired dance. It is decisive and usually choreographed as a group. Whether a stomp or a sway there is no wasted motion or flapping about. It is measured, ordered and inspired like the beating of a drum. What I have seen has been modern dance to modern music. It inspires awe and worship. But there are many acceptable styles.

Giselle also has learned to dance recently. An angel taught her. I watched some of the practice sessions but could not see her feet as she did not want me to see her mistakes. She showed me what she was learning later .... all though not always perfect or timed it was a child like Holy Spirit rendered dance. She is mostly in the music department of heaven. Specifically in the choirs and around the throne of God. She was very proud recently to show me a song she had written. It goes like this;

Haiti loves me this I know, for my Jesus tells me so ... Little ones to him belong and I know it isn't long. Yes Haiti loves me, yes Haiti loves me, yes Haiti loves me. My Jesus tells me so.

When the Spirit is present on a man, woman or child it is a glory and a grace. When the Spirit is present on a group it is miraculous. Like the members of the body, each works in a harmony that is ordered by Christ the head and cornerstone. We may not speak to each other but God speaks to each one and each one does it's part. Nearly every week I walk in the Spirit and the message God gives then go to church and hear it again perhaps with added information that rounds out and glorifies the Father who loves and orders his children.

I've been somewhat surprised to see that my person and gifts are appreciated even in heaven. Yesterday Gabriel sat down on a rock looking somewhat dejected. We were in shadow land. I went over to see what was up because that's just me ... I go see to those in need of comfort. It seems that he feels like much less of an angel then Michael. Since Michael and I did not get off on the right foot so much we had been adapting to each other and doing well. So I sat down to talk to Gabe for awhile. He sees himself as only a messenger angel and Michael as a mightier warrior angel. But Gabriel is a fighter too. I think I made him feel better because he is an awesome angel as well. Being a messenger angel is not less then being a warrior angel. Just different.

Even more surprising then having an opportunity to comfort angels was to offer comfort to the Lord. To have him reside in my heart is great joy and comfort to him as is my quick concern over anything I say or do that might bring him offense and estrange us to each other. He is ever pleased by our love and obedience but even that is a gift of the Spirit in us and to him.

Comfort is usually accompanied by kindness. And I tend to have a horror of treating anyone unkindly. In my natural this is simply an aversion to hard feeling, bickering or quarrels and a desire for peace. I like relationships to tick along smoothly .... selfish perhaps as there is a time to fight and one must avoid the tendency to compromise. But in the Spirit, kindness is a powerful force of reconciliation and for building up others. Our Lord is deeply kind to people. and the Holy Spirit is our Comforter.

'It is the same for angels, Giselle and her gifts. She is all of joy but only as long as she is in the Spirit which is where she draws her wells of joy from. Apart from him she may drift into some form of discontent. My service to her is to relieve her of her duties and service to me and send her up to the Father where she is safe and replenished. I love her deeply and the Father more.

Chapter 6 He Sanctifies To Us

Butterfly got a new name. Algonquin. According to wikipedia Algonquin means' "they are our relatives/allies". God told me it means' "feather" (because he said so). But most of us think of the Indian tribe related to the Odawa or Ojibwe Indians. Jesus reserves the right to rename anyone if their name becomes defiled or is used as a tool for ridicule. Butterfly was named by me for Giselle because of his resemblance to a flock of migrating butterflies but some might see the name as meaning he is weak, silly or effeminate. Angels are neither male nor female but they are mighty creatures and Butterfly/Algonquin is no exception. He is terrible and beautiful at the same time and no ninny. And Algonquin is confident of who he is ... A guardian angel.

Most of us experienced unfortunate nicknames in grade school. We grew up a bit and heard the mockery directed against where we came from or who we were related to. I know my sons have resorted to some swift physical justice for anyone who had something to say about their momma. And maybe they had to sit in a principals office for a bit .... but we're thinking that the principal might have done the same thing. Let me also say that if my boys ever find themselves in a life threatening situation where they are called upon to curse me that I'd rather that, then not ever seeing them again. Christian martyrdom is a different situation all together. Still I know my boys and their love for me and that they would die for me, their wives and their children.

It is good for a man to guard and protect his home, family, the weak or helpless and country if called upon to do so. No one should shield him from that responsibility for it robs him of his purpose and what makes him a man. This is not about turning the other cheek. It is not about revenge. It is about justice and being a man. There are times when it is appropriate for a man to deal out justice in the heat of a moment and this is not being a vigilante all though it could be if society is lacking in law and order and there is the need for a Spiritual awakening.

If you are called up in such a crisis, do not get too hung up on whether you did everything just right or somehow brought some disaster on yourself. The Lord himself is the only one who endured shame, disgrace and abuse in our place without fault. The Lord was not called to take up arms but to be a sacrifice. He laid down his life for us and the atonement of our sins that we might not perish but have eternal life. There is a time for martyrdom and a time to bare arms.

Still we may find ourselves in unfamiliar places where we stumble and commit the sins of youth. I have done so. God is good and forgives us our sins of ignorance, passion or will. And he sanctifies to us our deepest distress. So that we come forth wiser and bolder in the power of the Spirit because we have learned the hard way that we cannot walk in the flesh.

But always know that the Christ will not agree with anything that has come against you that may have degraded you. He has your reputation and your humanity in his hip pocket. Remain in him and no lie formed against you will prosper. You have strength and honor. I have watched you sacrifice. I've seen you tried, tested and transformed into the likeness of Christ.

Chapter 5 Humor Happens

I am not known for being a humorist but perhaps I make up for it with an appreciation for humor and the ability to laugh at other peoples jokes. So this chapter will perhaps ring true for you .... these thoughts come from heaven to you.

In the previous chapter I referred to having the mind of Christ and his ideas being the best. He would tell you that his ideas may or may not be the best depending, since some folks think it is a better idea to have two lords and that idea seems more acceptable to them. So perhaps he is not so fond of having his ideas stolen for the purpose of some becoming wealthy. You cannot serve two masters for you will love the one and hate the other .... you cannot serve both God and mammon (money). But he is rather free with his advice to all who believe and for the glory of God.

What splendor to have your mind illuminated by Christ. He reveals beauty and order all around. He shows us things that we would not have seen on our own. But the conversation has to start somewhere ..... go ahead and ask him a question ..... if there is no answer, pursue him, love him, rest in him, pray for the Spirit to take you deeper into relationship.

So here are a few quips:

So, Jesus, how long you been around? About as long as you have.

Jesus just fixed my heart, so I asked him, "Why?" and he says; "Because I can"

Some folks come to heaven all looser ed out about their mortal bodies and there are many who tell Jesus they would like to be thin again. Jesus just says, "Well, you are what you eat." ... sometimes you gotta think about it.

Soy Lent Green is people ... and cattle too.

He likes to let the Protestants know that the Catholics are right ... they just don't know how to say it.

"I love you, love you, love you .... and I'm always thinking of you." ~God

Some people's theology just needs to change because most often they just need to love people more and love change less.

Jesus said, "I love you and I'm always thinking of you." so I asked him to tell me something new and he said, well it is new because it's new every day.

When people tell Jesus that they hope their sins are forgiven he puts his arm around their shoulders and says, "they are if you want them to be."

Chapter 4 The Humor Of Heaven

There is much that is sad on this earth that dissipates in heaven. God is the source of all good humor and the laughter of Jesus and his children echos across the valley. This is now the fifth day of Christmas. I did not write anything on the fourth day because it was too full of life's woes. Some things are unspeakably sad and should not be remembered anymore unless perhaps as a cautionary tale. Or as a hallelujah of deliverance, mercy and grace.

The sum of life's woes can all be traced to the fall and much sadness exists because of man's sin and abuse of creation and a return to chaos and disorder. Let me say to my family that I love you. We have each had our share of grief. Some things are too private or painful to tell. I believe that Jesus would say; "My children, your sins are forgiven and that there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus .... go and sin no more." And what can we say in the face of such mercy and grace but; "Yes, Lord" .... then walk with and in him through our deliverance. All that has been repented of is water under the bridge and can be remembered against us no more.

But on to peace and joy. I cannot tell you how happy I am to have all my children here this Christmas. My boys and their wives and their children. Especially my son Lieutenant (Junior Grade) Jesse Bird, who has been away from us these last two and a half years in the Navy. Well they are all here except for the orphans. Last summer I went to Haiti as voluntary aid after the 2010 earthquake that hit Port A Prince. I went looking for a child ... a girl child, since there are more orphans now then before.

I found Samira in an orphanage in Chambrun, Haiti. She is six. We named her Samira Maere Paloma and were told that it might take nine to eighteen months to finalize an adoption. It has been two months since we received this word and God told me to buy her Christmas presents and make other necessary preparations .... well actually he told me to make preparations for two little girls and a baby down the road. I have inquired about a second child named Sandy but have heard nothing back on that score. Still we gave her the name Olivia Morganne Claire.

So here we are in our peace and joy of being together but our circle is not complete because Haiti is a sad place in many ways and these little ones are there and suffering. And so we send our prayers across the distance because there are no boundaries for God in heaven for his Spirit goes out everywhere. I cannot help thinking what joy they will have coming into our home. I nearly dropped and kissed the ground on my return from Haiti. So then much joy flows from sorrow. If I had never lost Giselle I would not have had Jesse or these girl children .... and over all I have had the profound joy of reconnecting with my child in heaven. I am not one who weeps at the drop of a hat. But I have cried more emotional, and thankful, happy tears over seeing my baby girl child then I have shed in a lifetime. God never takes anything away from us that he does not restore to us many times over ..... I have plans to look for more children to adopt in the future. There are many grandmothers who have taken in children.

While our home is a place of laughter and it is good to see my sons joking together, I have been more than surprised and amused to find so much fun and laughter in Zion. Jesus himself has rather a rye wit. Democrats who arrive in heaven find out that Jesus is a Republican and the Republicans find out that he is a Democrat and that much of what they thought of the seriousness of heaven is rather turned on it's head. But he is pro life and he does care about social justice and being green too.

Imagine him cutting up and hanging out with twelve other guys that he was deeply fond of. He was of heaven and earth and full of mirth and joy. He is deeply interested in everyone and accepting of our mortality .... no child of his ever feels ugly in his presence. Just deeply cared for .... and his ideas! Pray for the mind of Christ. I consult him whether planning a meal or art project. He is brilliant.

While Jesus is more then I expected, the archangel Michael is different then I expected. His humor was somewhat slapstick ... a constant charade game. This confused me at first but I was told that he is a mighty angel and does not reveal his complete glory so that man will not be tempted to fall down in worship. I appreciated the archangel Gabriel immediately but Michael was something of an acquired taste for me. But I have come to love him deeply. Michael is a warrior angel and a defender of God's people. He and Gabriel have kept me from much harm by the Lord's command. But Michael has adapted to my sense of humor some. He reflects my sons sense of humor more and I now find him to be quite funny. Tackling the opposition he will cast me a sidelong glance, briefly shrug his eyebrows as if to say; "How was that for ya."

Then there is Giselle. She is every darling thing I have ever seen in a child. Her inflections and mannerisms she tells me she has picked up from older children who have come to heaven. It is as though she exists for my pure delight.

...to be continued

Chapter 3 Travellers

On the second day of Christmas my daughter gave to me a room to sleep in Zion. Today is the third day of Christmas and I have tried it out and it is sweet. Thank you Jesus. It may not seem like much until you have spent near sleepless nights or had rude awakenings from terrible dreams .... the dreams going on after you have woken. My troubled sleep has been a symptom of a troubled brain these last four and a half years. My brother died an infant just before I was conceived and formed in the belly of my grieving mother marking me as dreamy little artist child .... easily rocked by life's swell and tempest. All though her grief marked my little brain I was considered a great comfort and the first born in my family.

Losing Giselle at the end of my first trimester was a grief I observed until, as an answer to my prayers, I conceived her brother Jesse upon her due date. I always feel a mixture of loss and compensation over these events of birth and death and .... loss and gifting. Jesse's connection to his sister was often on my mind as I carried him carefully to term and rocked him and the babe in heaven together.

Jesse was a source of great comfort also and the second born, the first being his brother Joshua who was three and a half years his senior. Josh was a melancholy but funny kid. We thought of him as the lawyer in the family as he always had a reason, argument or some defense to render. He was curious too. Jesse was all action and few words. He grew up to be a man who weighed seriously any advice but with a solid sense of humor.

Neither pregnancy was marked by any negative emotion much, but my third pregnancy was spent with a good bit of anxiety over some serious financial losses .... where we would live and what we would do. And lo and behold I gave birth to another dreamy little artist child ... easily rocked by life's swell and tempest and prone to anxiety as well.

I have sent up many prayers to the Father for my third son Caelen .... such that, by the cross, would break any inheritance of the sins of the fathers. He is doing well and so am I. Jesus comes along side and we learn to comfort with the comfort we have received. Then finally there was my fourth child Jonathan. I spent many months in depression before conceiving him on Mother's Day .... God had favored me and I spent that pregnancy much comforted and yet he was born with the cord wrapped round his neck and the symptoms of ADHD, but with a great sense of humor and the ability to lead.

So these are my children .... all five. But I digress. We were talking about Zion and a good nights rest .... and the dearly departed. Before you go rushing off trying to find your way there fellow traveller I would give you a map to Zion so that your sleep would be sweet and perhaps you will be comforted for you cannot take just any route .... there is only one.

Do not directly try to contact the dead for there are many deceiving spirits .... they are of the unholy and wish to lead you further astray and into profound confusion and torment. The only route to Zion and to the Father is through repentance and faith in the atoning work of the risen Son. It was he who said, I am the resurrection and the life. No man comes to the Father but by me. And those who die in the Lord are alive in him. They are safe in Zion a city that takes up no space at all and yet is as endless as the souls, dreams and memories of it's citizens. And there is humor .... they know something of the sadness of earth but with the perspectives of heaven .... Just wait, they will tell you and it will all be worthwhile.

So, you may say, you understand the gospel and know and hold to it's message as a promise here and now to you and your children after you and in the days to come but you have never been caught up to Zion in body or soul. And perhaps there are dearly departed waiting there for you and you would travel there to see and know something of what is waiting there. Let me confess that I did not go looking for Zion or for Giselle. It came to me. I think because someone prayed that I would be helped and Jesus named my daughter "help". But once I knew there was a route to Zion I needed to return. And I found that the only way for me to travel there was in the Holy Spirit. Through repentance of and remission of sin, praise and worship he comes to inhabit us. We lose out of his presence when we allow an evil spirit to take hold through some complaint or other evil emotion.

At first I could go no further then the hills around Zion. Jesus and Giselle would meet me there ... she holds his hand. I could hear my families voices too. The hills are the bad lands that end at the foot of Zion. Here we are subject to evil spirits that wish to provoke us into strife or in some other manner to shame or degrade us. Standing as close to Jesus here or anywhere outside of Zion is a place of refuge and safety for your mortal soul and body, for demons can even cause physical complaint and they ever probe for some breach where they might gain a foothold to separate us from the Father. I am learning to stay close and in touch by the minute .... it is a rest for my soul.

Giselle is not immune to attack outside of Zion. She is a human soul who all though no longer mortal takes the shape of a child in my mind. She resembles me and her Aunt Ruth and most often appears wearing a pink smocked dress and brown mary jane shoes. Her greatest capacity is for joy. I understand that this is because she would have been somewhat sad in her life on earth. My greatest capacity is for peace ... I have lived with my share of unrest and so the Spirit turns us around. Together we have the peace and joy of Christ which wells up in us and to each other.'

I am careful with her though. Not wanting to taint her with life's sin and trouble. I stay close to Jesus so that I will not offend her. This has only helped me ... so she has helped. And she prays for me ... sometimes she needs my prayers .... those in Zion need no prayers and she is there most of the time. It has cost her some personal peace to meet me in shadow land. She tells me that she has always been aware of me from the time she entered heaven and could look down to where I was, crying on the bathroom floor.

It was Jesus who asked her, one day, how she would like it if she could help her mommy. Jesus has a way of giving us choices but really no choice because we can generally tell which is the right choice and so Giselle was all for being mommy's helper. We are compatible .... neither of us actually takes a leading role. We are companions. Her childlike ways make my heart glad. She does ordinary things like kicking stones down a path, or cleaning up ... setting a table. These are the things she would have done as a child in my home. And she does everything with such heart and determination. Confidence too. There, I have pleased and embarrassed her.

Chapter 2 Audrey Hope

Another little one has imposed upon my times with Giselle. She is Audrey Hope. I'm told she is another unborn child. Her mommy is busy with a family, school and job and does not have time to come up here so Audrey calls me, "mommy" .... Giselle finds her mildly annoying since she is still very young and doesn't know quite how to behave. She knocks over blocks and toys and toddles about and wants to be just like Giselle. Every now and then Jesus picks her up and takes her back to heavens nursery. It is where earthly mommies come to rock their lost babies. I ask Giselle what we should give little Audrey for Christmas and Giselle has agreed to have her live in the Christmas Cottage with her. Audrey bends over and pretends to toot sugar plums and peppermints then dances a child like stomp through the sparkles.

So today, during my walk and talk with Giselle I hear a little voice, "Mommy .... it's Awdrey." I reply, "Yes, honey?" .... "No, AWDREY!" ... Giselle leans over to whisper to her that "honey is a word like sweetheart." Audrey begins to whimper for my attention. I toss her up to Jesus ... I do the same with Giselle or myself when we are feeling needy. Afterwards I take Audrey on my lap and into my heart. This is tricky. I pray to give Christ his proper place and love these little ones with the love of the Lord ... it is so easy to see a source of love as the source of love. It is less of a problem when we are in Zion for it is the presence of the Lord and there our hearts are glad and there is no want or loss for love. But here on the outskirts or that place where we meet somewhere between heaven and earth there are ugly things that try to impose upon our time together. And so we pray for the presence of the Lord and for all his holy angels. I have met Michael and Gabriel ... Giselle's angel which she shares with me. We named him Butterfly. He is covered all over with wings. When he is in flight he is nearly transparent and when he lands the wings close and he is visible and still as medieval stone. Sometimes all we see of him is something like the breast and wing of a swan, feathers extended. He has a special concern for the creation and does not like to see it suffer ... for God cares for the peoples of the nations and the many cattle too. I eat less meat now because it seems to grieve him .... man's survival hinges much on the groaning of the earth ... we see it in Passover and the crucifixion ... the sacrificial system .... there will be no death in the new heavens and the new earth.

Then there is Agnus. I went looking for him and found him to be The Ancient of Days. All the wisdom of the ages rests upon his shoulders. He is The Angel of the Lord (the Christ) for his symbol is the lamb. He carries a sword and is chaste and stern. He guards the purity of God's people, for they are his. But I see Jesus mostly relaxed and happy .... throwing his arm around one of the redeemed or romping with the children. His voice full of the Spirit blesses me .... "I am your Lord and Savior." My heart is healed and I brim with gratitude ... for me, for my children and for folks in general.

All holy angles rely and depend upon the Lord for their strength and purpose. They are compelled to action by the prayers of God's people and the resulting word of the Father. They live to honor and serve God and his children. They are earnest and helpful but shy of praise and worship for these were the beginning of the fall of the archangel Lucifer and his angelic followers. O to be among the heavenly angels ... to serve before the presence of God and to ever behold his face and favor. And yet we are God's counterpart .... his special creation .... the ones for whom he died.

Christmas With Giselle Chapter 1

Santa came late yesterday morning. Which means that I ran out of time Christmas Eve to do just everything and my son was up early. I fought the urge to feel rushed and a little cross that not all my i's were dotted or my t's crossed. It is the Lord's birthday after all. I filled stockings for my family and the orphans which did not come. Opened Christmas presents with David and Jonathan. Made up beds from the company of the previous week. My navy boy and his wife. It has been two and a half years since I have seen Jesse and a year since visiting with Gabrielle. It was good.

Finally I sat down to see Giselle. There she is in my minds eye. Darling child. A memorial poinsettia sits in the pot on my dining room table. I close my eyes and begin to send her Christmas presents .... the finest I can imagine. A thatched roof cottage with a mill stream and stone walls. There are sheep and a pony with a little cart. Cherry trees bloom through a snow storm. The snow flakes are so large you can see each one as under a magnifier. There is a snow man ..... a frozen pond appears where she skates and a flock of swans swim .... I did not think it but there it is. Over a cliff there is the ocean where conch and sea shells can be gathered ... turn the page and she has a tree house.... not everything exists in the same space but can be recalled ... just to think it is to be there.

Inside the house is a German Christmas Tree with candles and cherubs hanging the icicle ornaments. There is a crackling fire and a rocker like the one in my living room. Under the tree are presents. The most special for her is a doll house. Like Alice she can shrink and walk from room to room. The animated dolls are members of her family. She dances in a circle with Caelen, Samantha and Norelei. She has several dolls of me from the time I was a child to my present age. She clasps her hands to her little heart and falls over backwards .... it is the best Christmas she has ever had ... the first with her mommy in heaven. We talk about how the doll house should be decorated and Jesus decides that we can turn pages and have any design we want, at any given time.

Back in the cottage she decides that she wants my Longaberger Pottery, Ironstone and Canton China in the cupboards. She has a closet full of clothes and decides she wants to be a ballerina in a pink tutu. I hand her a book from my childhood and then fill up a library for her of all my childhood favorites .... Sherlock Holmes, Winnie The Pooh, The Book House Collection, Peter Pan .... she opens a book and the story unfolds like animation. I pretty much cry through everything .... because it's beautiful .... because I'm sorry we were parted .... but glad she is where she is. I'm crying because all though her life is in glory she still wants to be with me ... she wants us, her family to be where she is so that her joy will be complete.

So what does Giselle give to me? Sometimes when I feel weary I hear her little voice saying, "Mommy, Jesus loves you and so do I." And so to you dear reader, "Jesus loves you and so do I."

And to you dear Jesus .... "I love you too".

Hello Sandy

God gave me a name for you. It just felt right and none other would do. Your name Sandy is the Scottish derivative of the Italian name Sandra which is the short form of Alessandra or the English Alexandra. It means defender of mankind. We also understand sandy as a soil that we find most commonly beach side. But this name I give to you as a gift; Olivia Morganne Claire.

'

Olivia is Latin for olive. Morganne is Welsh for the sea. Claire is Latin for bright. The metaphor that I see for you is of the dove with olive branch that flew out from the ark and over the waters seeking a place of rest. She is a symbol of the Holy Spirit and a sign of peace. Like a lighthouse by the sea she sends out a light to guide storm tossed sailors into harbors of rest. Out of your own troubles and chaos you will find a place of solid ground .... the Rock of Ages. And you will be a light ... a city upon a hill drawing men to God and to that Rock.

Repurposed ... and Ready To Go

A few entries back I told about a dream of being taken to heaven. So here I am in the now. And I want to be there but my life is not finished yet. It must be like walking on the moon .... leaping over craters in lead boots .... feeling weightless. Then coming to earth again where every step seems like an effort. I have a lower threshold of tolerance for frustration. I pray more. Heaven comes down and glory fills my soul. All is well. I can take the next step.

'

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving. Today I am most thankful for heaven. I am thankful for my daughter who loves me and is waiting for me there. I am thankful for Christ who has made all this possible and who loves me too. I am thankful that he is here with me now that my life seems so much harder to bear .... and then he makes it easy for me. I am thankful for my family and loved ones who are the reason I am still here. I love you ... see you tomorrow. I am thankful for the pleasure I find in my work .... I mean knitting and quilting and not so much scrubbing toilets. I am thankful for my health and my home. I'm thankful for the purpose which has me here ... But what shall I do? I do not know. For me to die is gain and to live is Christ (Apstl. Paul). I shall remain .... and I pray it is to bless you. I'm thankful for Haiti ... and for the chance to open my home to more children. I'm thankful for the promises of God .... I will never leave you or forsake you.... Bless the Lord O my soul.

'

Beaulah

'

Ahme, ahme, my feet shift on alien soil.

This place is not my home.

My heart ache for motherland.

I believe she will receive me on her knees.

'

I stand on fringes of the shore.

Do not hold me back. My heart ache for motherland.

I will lay my head to rest upon her knees.

'

Why stay where I do not belong?

My feet do not know this dance.

My heart ache for motherland.

I will be kissed and dandled on her knees.

'

This land, it leaves my belly empty.

So that I forget I am more than beast.

My heart ache for motherland.

She will feed me golden cornbread from her knees.

'

Ahme, ahme, this place is not my home.

~Melanie R. Bird
'

Mihereta Yesus II*

'

Look on the one adored,

Who once blackened and cast down,

Now in graceful pillared

service of her Lord.

Daughter of the Son,

O holy one,

The golden gleam

Upon you head

pierced the hand

That placed it there.
Your glory given

To slaughter lead

The one who took

Your shame to bear.

The faithful wounds
His lips have healed

With tender touch

Your heart has sealed.

And of his goodness you confess,

The lovers hands with mercy dress.

~Melanie R. Bird

(Mihereta Yesus, Eritrean for The Compassion of Jesus)

'

My Comforter Comes

'

Let me see your face,

Gentle smile trace.

To the dark belong

Comfort, mother song.

Feather soft your touch,

Slipping down to such

A weary lover.

'

Hush me with a whisper,

Kiss of evening vesper.

Sweet the words are said,

Falling on my head.

Like a bird they hover,

Or a downy cover,

Settled on my heart.

~Melanie R. Bird

When We Were Five

Happy Birthday Miss Lauren Ava.

'

Some of my dearest memories are of you running up to greet me at your front door like a little church lady welcoming me to tea ... then saying goodbye so sadly ... "Please come back soon." ... or the times, early on, when you came to visit grammie and decided to go through my stuff (makeup, jewelry). I set up some boundareis but loaned you a bracelet watch that you could borrow whenever you came to visit. Now every time you come you wander upstairs and find "your" watch. Or the time I carried you downstairs and set you down only to have you look up sweetly in my face and say, "I'm gonna pick you a flower."

'

We have made cookies together, decorated for the holidays, and experimented with various craft projects. I have watched you mature and become more structured, responsible and self controlled. I am so proud of you. May God continue to give you a spirit of peace and joy.

'

While I am not your mother I am your gramma. We have a very special relationship. I did not rock you in the wee hours of the mourning ... or nurse you or change your nappies day in and day out. It was not for me to decide where you went to school, church or day care. What I have done is pray for you ... visited with you on the holidays or had you come to stay when mommy & daddy needed an extra pair of hands. Little girl, I love you. God bless you and keep you and gift you.

Health, Wealth?

One of the things I have not missed in my time away from the Presbyterian church was the seeming need to be argumentative. One would think that a woman could give a personal testimony on a personal blog without folks feeling the need to pick a fight. Well okay then ... but before you get out the big guns please read both my blogs in their entirety.

'

Today's issue; Do bad things happen to "good" people .... am I preaching health and wealth? And, do Christians who take medication have less faith.

'

Bad things do happen to everybody. We live in a fallen world. It is generally not our place to judge why another person is suffering. The individual who is suffering may come to their own conclusions as to why something dreadful has occurred in their life. If they ask our opinion we certainly may offer it with the goal of bringing that person closer to the God of all comfort.

'

The problem with the so called "health & wealth gospel" is that the good news of the death and atonement of Jesus Christ is secondary to what God can do for you materially speaking. We do not love the Giver but the gifts. Health and wealth gospel promises us the good life if we will just come to Jesus .... we want the good life but not necessarily Jesus. This is a skewed approach to a relationship with God but one that is common to man .... it is called idolatry. We are not grafted into the vine .... we are grafted into some other barren desire. Yet when God penetrates our hearts with his love and with a desire for more of him and for kingdom come our lives cannot help but be affected for the better.

'

Finally, I addressed this whole topic of whether Christians should take medication in my Bird House Blog under the topic title O Yes They Call It The Blues. In this article I stated that medication was a personal decision (You lose the ability to chose for yourself if you cannot control yourself). Medication has it's value and it's place but it is not a substitute for eating right, exercise or God. Too often it has functioned as a substitute for what we actually need.

'

So I will repeat again what has brought me improved health; singing praise songs to God, eating organic, less gluten and sugar, bio natural hormones, and excercise. I am not on any medications and I no longer even take vitamins. I do eat omega rich fish about five times a week (Trader Joe's has batter dipped fish nuggets that are great for lunch .... snacking on almonds or walnuts is good too). I am currently in the best health that I have ever had but it has been a two year process and I have not made all my goals ..... I am thankful to God for this improvement .... I could serve him healthy or sick ..... I believe he has called me to be whole.

'

* Christ Healing The Sick, Rembrandt

Then There Were Two

Sandy (Sensie) was always borrowing my camera. She was a pretty good little photographer and a happy, unassuming type. I gave her my water bottle the last day in Chambrun. She looked surprised but pleased.

'

Sandy is not numbered among the orphans but I got the feeling a couple of weeks back that she and Samura both needed some serious prayer. So I did and have since inquired as to her availability for adoption .... she might not have parents. I am still waiting for details on the adoption request but Pastor Pierre of Chambrun is scheduled to have dinner in our home the end of October while he is visiting in the states. He plans to update us on the adoption situation then.

'

I began this adoption proceeding expecting that it would take awhile and I didn't want to be anxious about it. But then God ... he placed a compelling love in my heart for Samura & Sandy ... he coupled that with a deep concern for their situation. It is hard to wait when I know that I could help them ... I think it's called godliness with contentment. Being ready to do something good .... but obligated to wait.

Parenting

They are a blessing and a trust. Children. God gives us all good things to enjoy but also to care for. Usually the mother is first to fall in love with the child. She is the one most impacted with the reality of a new life. The father comes on board later with the first helpless cry or crooked grin. That child is a blessing but also a trust. In order to take care of something properly we need some knowledge and experience. I was handed my first baby boy at the age of 19 and had neither. Now as a grandmother I know so much more. .... and this is what I know;

'

Our children, as precious as they are, are sinners. Jesus loves sinners. Jesus loves us and our children. We both need to know Jesus to live a truly wholesome and good life. As parents the job falls to moms and dads to prepare the way for Christ in a child's heart. That means that the child must first see Christ in us. We need to live a life empowered by the Holy Spirit that loves God and others including our children. We need to pray and tell them about Jesus and that he is the reason that we are able to live in the supernatural. Our children need love and structure. But we will fall short.

'

God loves us and is there to help us with our responsibilities. We can access that assistance in raising children but parents may be dealing with their own problematic past .... a lack of knowledge and experience or even abuse. Here is the warning label that comes with your child; If anyone causes one of these little ones to stumble it would be better for him to have a mill stone tied around his neck and to be dropped into the depths of the sea. Raising a child is a serious business ... we need to apply ourselves. We need to seek God's face. There are eternal consequences at stake. This is a priority.

'

What causes little ones to stumble? An offense .... Father's do not embitter your children ... abuse, criticism, molestation, lack of training or loving discipline, perpetuated folly of any sort. Children are not so resilient as we have heard ... no one is. Look at the soldier returning from war or prison camp ... how many issues are there? We all bear scars from living in this place with folks that have sinned against us. We have believed lies .... we have absorbed the example of others and mistakenly thought that God did not care for us .. that we were not worth much ... or that God even hates us. We have owned and perpetuated these lies.

'

In these lies we stumble and even go astray with hearts that have hardened against God and man. How serious it is to raise up a child with a little heart that has grown a hard protective shell against God and others? What kind of life will they live in this world? Is there eternal salvation at stake? We have been entrusted as parents with a compelling responsibility. It may be that heart surgery is needed on us before we pass on that hard heart to our children. Jesus knows and he can help. It is never too late.

A Prayer For The Lost

A Prayer
'
As my thoughts in restless turning,
Thru deep sigh express the yearning,
All my heart and keen desire,
Rescue sinner from the fire.
'
Chilling sweat and labored pain,
And all hopes that I might gain.
On my tears compassion take,
And mercy grant for Jesus sake.
~Melanie R Bird
'

No one prays for a person like a mother or father. There is no wondering; "Is this person elect ... is this God's will?" There is just the bottomless cry from a deep seated need to see a precious child own all that God has for them. We may pray earnestly for the lost in every place and expect that God will do all his holy will but when it comes to our child we are on our face before God refusing to take no for an answer. This earnest desire may often extend beyond our biological children to others. God places a parental call and concern on our heart for some individual.

'

And yet, God may not answer right away. He may seem to reject our request. He may allow us to wrestle with him, beg, reason and insist. Finally he will drop to his knees, cup our face in his hands and say, "Child, great is your faith... let it be done as you have asked." ... time may pass while we wait for the promised fruition but in heaven it is as good as done. We do not pray to own something .... this is a catch and release. Like Hannah we have begged God for something with the understanding that we are giving it back to him. No individual will be truly happy apart from the heavenly Father. We may remain an agent of blessing as Christ's love and peace and joy overflows our hearts to others but we can never replace God in any one's life.

'

Giving someone to the Father may mean that he takes them far away or it may be that they live right next door. Regardless, If you love that person you have a responsibility to them. God has placed that love in your heart. We all need a few people who truly care for us ... it is a gift from God. Caring for someone does not mean giving them up and walking away. Caring for someone means standing by whether near or far and continuing to love and pray for them. You are a force for good in their life. You have stewardship of that relationship. You are someone who loves them with the love of the Lord. If you leave your post who will care for them?

The Scape Goat

There are times when an individual may feel that their actions are of such a heinous nature that they do not want to own up. Forgiveness and atonement are contingent upon repentance. Judas was one who could not bring himself to repent. He had betrayed the innocent ... he had betrayed the Christ. Instead he ended his life and is numbered amongst the reprobate. He took upon himself a curse and carried it to the grave and beyond.

'

His counterpart, Peter, repented for his denial of Christ. Judas acted in greed. I've heard it said that he probably thought that Christ would be able to sidestep trouble as he had so many times before. But then he saw how things were going ... and he couldn't take it back .... he couldn't give the blood money back. Nothing he did could change the course of events set off by his betrayal; that kiss that delivered Christ up to his death. Full of shame and regret he ends his life unable to face up to and repent of what he had done. A scape goat.

'

And Peter, frightened Peter. Following at a distance to see what would happen to his Lord. Someone fingered Peter. He stumbles back denying and cussing, frightened not once but three times. Turn back the clock to Peter telling Christ he would never deny him ..... if all else were to leave ... not Peter. And Peter knew shame. Till Christ found him and reconciled him and Peter repented and continued a new man. Not a scape goat but one washed in the blood of the lamb.

'

Folks appreciate a scape goat. When things go wrong we'd like to hang it around some one's neck and send them packing. Some folks are honest and willing to own up to sin ..... now here is a patsy .... why they have admitted to something. Let us just shift all the blame onto them. Serving as a scape goat is no service. People do not need someone to shift their blame onto. They need to own up, repent and have their sins forgiven.

'

King David tried to cover up heinous sin by setting up Uriah to take a hit for the team. Taking out Uriah solved a lot of problems for David. But Uriah was a righteous man. Uriah was the salt of the earth. Salt is a preservative. When a preservative is not in effect things begin to rot and decay. The world was not a better place without Uriah. But sometimes God removes the righteous as an act of judgement on a situation and as protection for the righteous. Yet God saw what was done and was not pleased. David did finally repent and is numbered among the righteous. He left his life of sin and became salt again.

'

My point is that we do not need to worry when we have a little or a lot to confess. It is hard to deal with shame. But there is only one wholesome way to deal with sin and that is to confess and forsake. If something needs to be made right we first get right with God. Then he walks us through the rest. We do not have to worry about what to say. The Spirit will give it to us. There are no scape goats under the blood of the lamb.

Privates

There are many subjects we deem inappropriate for general conversation .... politics and religion .... personal finance or personal anything. But now and then there comes along someone who thinks they are entitled to know what your personal something is. Maybe they are ... maybe they aren't ... depending.

'

Some information we keep private because it will incite riot. Toss out some bit of information and instantly people are polarized over an issue ..... there is a place for debate but not necessarily in your general day to day conversations. There also is a place of peace ... it is found in Christ but that is a topic for another day. Any way I am rather free with my opinions here.

'

Now anyone may read my blog. This is my forum to state my views. And I have not run into any argument. Perhaps because I am well with in my boundaries and my blog is marked "personal". If someone were to come to my blog and leave rude or controversial comments they would be the one crossing boundaries. I do not mind disagreement but I will not stand to be bullied on my own turf. To retreat would just simply be milk toast.

'

But even though this blog carries my personal opinions on the spiritual life and personal testimony there is much that is not said. One of the problems made when an individual gives a personal testimony is too much detail. Sometimes I watch these Curb Appeal and Home Stagier TV programs. One of the common bits of advice given by the realtor to the seller is that the home must not be too personal .... so family photos are taken down .... bathroom toiletries are cleared from counters .... toys and clutter are put away. The home is then staged to look "move in ready". The buyers can more easily imagine themselves moving into this space because all personal trace of the actual owners has been removed.

'

This is much like how a personal testimony functions. If it carries too much detail the listener or buyer is distracted or even repelled. They cannot own or relate to your story .... either they think you have done unspeakable things that you should forever feel guilty or ostracised for or they think that your conscience is much too sensitive and your testimony a bit ridiculous. You, the teller or seller are setting out a stumbling block that keeps the listener from being able to relate to your story. They cannot place themselves into your space .... they cannot connect with your God through your testimony.

'

Or perhaps your story is widely known and anyone may find out about it. The Apostle Paul dealt with both types of testimony. It was widely known that Paul once Saul had persecuted the church. People died and he was responsible. It was while he was on the road to Damascus, a mission to arrest early Christians, that the risen Christ knocked him off his horse and changed his course forever. Of his former life, Paul says he was forgiven on account of his ignorance and repentance. He thought by persecuting the Christians he was doing the work of God. Once he realized his error he worked harder then anyone to pursue the right course. Paul was saved by the grace of God but his repentance was proved genuine by his actions.

'

On another occasion Paul writes of his "thorn in the flesh". He testifies to the purpose of some great trial in his life but does not specify. There is wide speculation about what exactly this thorn was. The most commonly held opinion was that it was an eye disease. But because it is ambiguous nearly anyone can move into his testimony and own it. It has brought comfort and instruction to many.

'

Refraining from giving too much detail in a personal testimony is also an act of self protection. We are not called to bring up our sins over and over for repeated review or judgement. If Christ has removed our sins as far as the east is from the west and remembers them no more then all that is left to say is that we are cleared in the eyes of God ... we bear our sins no more and we are free of guilt. I once heard the testimony of a former communist and persecutor who had become a Christian. Since I was the editor of the church news paper Cross Culture it was suggested that I interview him for the next publication. So I did. His response was to say that he did not wish to dwell on his past and his greatest shame .... he would rather talk about what God was doing with him now. Rehashing past failures can encourage spiritual depression. Even if those failures have been forgiven we may still carry a deep sense of shame.

'

This air of privacy is completely valid and appropriate. For others to invade that privacy is just wrong. And here I am not speaking of legal issues. Legalities have to do with the facts and what was actually said and done and if laws have been broken. Intention is taken into consideration in the legal realm when sentence is being handed down. But I am speaking to the spirit and to moral law which includes the obedience to world government in most situations.

'

Yet sometimes privacy is not about the past but the present. We are in the middle of a terrible grief or struggle and we have not yet arrived on the other side. We do not yet have perspective or testimony. This is where events are unfolding and we should not be going it alone. We need godly and private counsel. Certainly we have God but he brings others alongside to help us. Is everyone involved? It's not generally a good idea .... too many cooks. But perhaps one or two wise individuals who are concerned enough to pray for us, tell us the truth and help us remove anything that is hindering us from reaching our full potential. And don't think that the one in trouble is the only one benefiting from this "help" ... we are all learning ... we are all in need of correction. He will clothe the contrite. Do not fear shame or disgrace.

'

Privacy is however an inadequate cloak for continued sin. There is nothing that will not be made known. And God has a way of ripping the covers off hypocrisy. Confessing sin is a big step toward forsaking that sin. As a general rule we should be confessing our own sins ... there is nothing more annoying then someone confessing our sins before we have a chance ... I think it's called accusation, deflection or maybe gossip. There is a process for rebuking a brother or sister which is too often ignored. The first step is to speak to the offender privately and directly. If there is not resolution the next step is to have a witness or two present. If there is still no resolution then it is brought up before the church. If even yet there is not a resolution the guilty party is put out of the church membership. Yet so many people do this backwards. This is no light matter. To be outside the church is to be numbered among the disobedient and unbelievers ... it is the realm of Satan. It is not a healthy or happy place. Working this system backwards can also arouse great hostility and chaos.

'

Can just anyone approach us about anything? No. There is such a thing as a busy body. In the church, however we have shepherds or elders. These are wise men recognized and appointed by the church to have spiritual supervision over the flock. Usually a shepherd/pastor/elder oversees a smaller group within the congregation. This group and their elder are encouraged to know one another so that if the need arises the people have a "go to guy". There are also those with in the church who are gifted with the ability to counsel. Even in these instances their are checks and balances and accountability to avoid the pitfalls of too much intimacy.

'

Most of us go for regular check ups to a doctor where we may bring up any little symptoms we may be experiencing. Usually a nurse is present to assist the doctor and patient and to ensure that everything is done properly. She is also a witness in case of criminal accusation. This doctor is usually knowledgeable enough to understand the root cause of the patients symptoms. So it is with a wise and godly counsellor. They will be able to help you finger the cause of your problem and work with you compassionately and respectfully towards a cure. Going it alone with our problems is a significant risk with significant consequences. Even the Lone Ranger had Silver and Tonto.

In Not Of

Like my poetry, blogging helps me sort things out. And I go back and read my own stuff because I forget ... I rarely change much once I've finished posting except for the occasional typo or grammatical error .... which I'm sure there are plenty .... One of my common errors is to switch "there" and "their" .... of course the spell check does not catch that one. It's a lot like reading music and trying to hit all the notes right. I have to proof read and tweak .... make sure the information is accurate and that my intentions are not misunderstood.

'

Besides writing I am in the minority of folk that likes public speaking. My eyes kind of light up when someone hands me a microphone all though I generally don't initiate these occasions. Everyone likes a good listener and listening is important. But if I do get a microphone you will listen because I will make you listen and because you will sense the urgency of what I have to tell you and I will compel your interest.

'

There (or is that "their"... Hah!) so you have learned a little bit more about me. If I were to go on it would be self indulgent. In previous posts I have identified myself as a saint and a sinner. Just as I do not spend my time in foolish boasting I do not spend it in dishing up the dirt on wayward youth. These things have been repented of and God only sees me as his own dear child. I am forgiven, older and wiser yet still a sinner. Being honest about yourself does not mean that you have to walk around naked to please the perverse curiosity of strangers. I try to deal kindly with others so that I may treat myself with equal kindness. By all means make amends where ever you can but do not sit woefully in your pig pen .... lift your head and square your shoulders. You are the apple of his eye.

'

As his dear children, who have not yet finished our race and entered into glory, we are still the object of Satan's great hatred. We will find ourselves battling against the world the flesh and the devil. Against such constant pressures we may stumble forward and sometimes backwards. There is no temptation that has seized you which is not common to man. If we fall back it is likely that it will only increase our desire for holiness .... sin and it's consequences are much like drinking sour milk ... we want to spit it out. And sin takes it's toll on the body. But to live this holy, healthy life ... to be in this (sinful) world but not of it, we need armour ... we need protection and God knows this and has no intention that we be like naked babes exposed to the elements. He surrounds and clothes us with his presence. I will not leave you as orphans ..... never will I leave you, never will I forsake you .... my mother and father may forsake me but the Lord will receive me.

'

In a previous post I spoke of a desire for kingdom come. Kingdom comes first to men's hearts but it doesn't stop there. It flows outward like a glorious river .... oh the deep deep love of Jesus that refreshes all the land. We are working towards kingdom come. So for now we are in the world but we are not of this world .... we are of the kingdom, subjecting every thought to Christ ... asking for and receiving the mind of Christ ... asking and receiving the fruits of the Spirit. Making a wholesome difference in this world. Ushering in the kingdom.

'

Such lofty ideals. Yet here we are with our feet on the ground or in the mud rubbing shoulders with obnoxious people. We are in community but sometimes we think we would be holier sitting on a mountain top somewhere with God 24/7. And we need those times alone with him to get our heads on straight but then we have to come down off the mountain and live with the real people who have the real problems. And attitudes are contagious. It's like someone with the flu sneezing on you and now you are sick too. Foolish behavior draws derision .... hatred butts up against hatred ,... and seduction precedes immorality. There are spiritual forces at work in choreographed attack formations trying to take you out. Not that we should fear but that we would be armed with a little knowledge and preparation.

'

If a Christian person contagious with the wrong sort of attitude advances on you, you have every right to move away from them. It is a rebuke to them to get their house in order so that they may live in Christian community. Details on this instruction is found in scripture along with the charge to pray for one another. This teaching does not apply to unbelievers. It is problematic for a believer to enter into partnership with unbelievers in marriage or even business since their values clash and a believer may be forced to compromise. While there is a special bond that we celebrate in the family of God, every man is our neighbor to love as we love ourselves. And we love with the love of the Lord.

'

But in this world Satan holds sway. Understanding his devices gives you a heads up and helps you check thoughts and attitudes at the door. You do not have to own or feel guilty about every thought that comes into your head. We are tempted and tried at every turn and temptation is no sin. If you yield to temptation in agreement of thought or actions then you have sinned. If Satan cannot get you to agree with him he will find other ways to provoke you. This attack may come through a relationship or a physical infirmity. Curb the angry and stressed response and begin to praise and thank the Father. Let God arise and his enemies be scattered! Your peace will increase and frustrations will subside, kingdom comes, the Spirit surrounds you, you own the atmosphere of heaven, Zion stands and ... Satan retreats. You will walk from glory unto glory. Further out and further in to joy.

Young Man

When I was a young child I was inspired to write a War of the Worlds Sci Fi script. I think the only deviation from the rather well known plot is that the aliens were giant killer crabs. So I dug out my little black and white composition book .... the one you buy at the Acme, and scribbled out my story. I was, however, somewhat stymied for an ending. How would good triumph over evil and how do you kill a giant killer crab? My auntie happened to be in the seat next to me so I asked her ..... "How do you kill crabs?" ... "Well I guess you drop them in boiling water." she replied. The wind quickly went out of my sales .... it seemed a rather lame ending for my story. Giant killer crabs are obviously too big for stock pots and running around dousing them with boiling water somehow fell short of a dramatic conclusion. I laid my story aside.

'

Another dream bites the dust. We start out really inspired and then end on a note of disappointment. We lay the dream aside. But it doesn't have to be that way. I don't know about you but I pray a lot. I figure that I need all the help I can get. But I don't always win .... I don't always succeed .... and I sometimes fail. When I fail or fall short of genius I tend to quibble a bit with God ..... "Did I not ask you to help me with this?" .... "Why did you put me in this situation when you knew it was over my head!?!" .... "Why did you make me like this?" .... "Why did you let this happen to me?"

'

I quibble because my initial response is to feel that God .... who claims to be my friend .... has somehow betrayed me. I feel stung .... "thought me and God were partners!" It is a response I am learning to check. Because I can ask him, "Why?" ..... and if I listen he gives me the most beautiful reasons and in the end all I can do is fall down in gratitude and praise. Dear reader, I do not know your situation ..... but could it be that "if I never had a problem I would not know that God could solve them".... or that my sins and disapointments have brought me to my knees in humility and with a renewed compassion for the struggles of others ... or that it was necessary for me to know that I am a very great sinner so that I may know that Christ is a very great Savior?

'

And what of our griefs? I tell you the truth, there is nothing that God has taken away from one of his children or asked them to give up that he will not replace with the better or give back to them many times over. This I know. It is a promise. It is scripture. Be comforted.

'

So, dear reader, like all the rest you have failed. You may be at the place where you believe some kind of change is in order. Here I can repeat the gospel message to you of the sacrifice of Christ and the forgiveness of sins, and this is our foundation. But we still have a problem in our flesh .... our soul is willing .... our flesh is weak and compromised. We have a dream but we do not see how it can be realized. Our body is not evil but it can be in bondage .... keeping us from doing the things we want to do. All solutions seem rather lame and we fall short of glory. We are ready to drop out of the race. The Apostle Paul owned this very problem .... we are in good company. But only because Paul recognized this problem as something he did not want .... he wanted a cure and he persevered in God's grace and never laid his dream aside.

'

We all want a cure. When people start recognizing that we have a problem because our actions reflect more of the drunkard then of a man getting the job done (Pro. 31: 1-9) ... we want a cure. God is the answer to our flesh as well as to our soul, mind, and emotions. "Do you not know that you are God's temple and that God's Spirit dwells in you? If anyone destroys God's temple, God will destroy him. For God's temple is holy and you are that temple." (1 Cor. 3:16) .... in other Scriptures we are told that this temple was not meant for sexual immorality but for the Lord. Sexual immorality is idolatry like any addiction. The abomination that causes desolation has entered the temple. Lust sits on the throne of God which is our heart.... this is why we cannot walk the line. Yet we may repent and ask for the Spirit and an undivided heart. Yes it hurts. But for the joy set before us we can endure. Freedom waits. Let God do his work in us. Our perfection will consumate in glory. The alternative is destruction.

'

Mihereta Yesus I*

'

When your feet in wayward walking

pleasure seeker, boastful talking.

Did God's face seem cold and stern,

an angry fire, judgment burn?

Causing love lost thirsty search,

drain the cup but never quench.

'

When you turn in desperation

listen for the voice that calls

for the sinner, celebration,

when he on the mercy falls.

'

You are chosen as a son.

Swiftly in obedience run,

For the wind is at your back

Power pulls you down the track.

Losing self, gainful action,

You have found your satisfaction.

~Melanie Bird

''

Then the fire of the Lord fell and burned up the sacrifice, --

When the people saw this, they fell prostrate and cried,

"The Lord - he is God! The Lord - he is God!" ...

And Elijah said to Ahab, "Go, eat and drink for there is the sound of a

heavy rain." ... Elijah climbed to the top of Carmel,

bent down to the ground and put his face between his knees ...

Meanwhile, the sky grew black with clouds, the wind rose, a heavy rain

came on and Ahab rode off to Jezreel. The power of the Lord came

upon Elijah and, tucking his cloak into his belt, he ran ahead of Ahab

all the way to Jezreel. (I Kings 18: 16-45)

'

I will bless you O Lord!.. I will bless you O Lord! For you have made man. In your own image you have made man. A little lower then the angels you have made man. When we look at his brow we see that you have crowned him with glory .... his shoulders with strength .... he has the arms for protection and hands meant to work, provide and love.God crown him with your love and mercy. Uphold him when he is weak and tired. Lead him in the way he is to go. Let him love your law. Forgive him when he falls. Comfort him when he feels ashamed. Establish the work of his hands, yes establish the work of his hands.

'

Construction Zone

(Written during the Construction of the New High School)

Spring 2005

'

The columns and beams bolted together, the ironwork for the new school,

Formed three grey crosses as you looked at it from

The window of the old school dispensation.

'

At the top of one column, an iron worker perched,

Lining up the beams to support

The weight of white in coming winters.

'

Suddenly, a rusted bulldozer belching smoke

Hit a footer, and with an angry growl

Knocked the sturdy column.

'

The worker felt the jolt

Grabbed the rugged column at the cross

While the whole structure shuddered.

'

He froze in fear.

Envisioning falling free,

His fardels following.

'

Then he laughed,

Yelled an imprecation

At the beast below.

'

12 o'clock.

Hanging his bag of bolts

On a spike in arms reach,

He came down

singing to his rest.

~David Bird

*Mihereta Yesus is Ethiopian for The Compassion of Jesus. It was the name of the mission hospital where my mother and father-in-law Herbert & Mary Bird served as missionaries.

O Love That Will Not Let Me Go

Okay, I did it. I defined my views on sex and marriage as being one man, one woman. Heretofore I have avoided this topic because I think that practicing homosexuals have become a scape goat in the Evangelical Christian Community. Like the woman caught in adultery there are folks pointing fingers and picking up rocks, ready to accuse those who have come out of the closet while they remain in there own.

'

What I mean by that is, that I have had enough perversity and down right evil in my own thoughts, in my own lifetime, to realize that I live in a glass house and should not be pitching stones. And we have the rising divorce rate to prove all is not well in the Christian Community. Is there pedophilia behind the desire for the ever younger? Can you be married to the same person for 30 years and be thinking about someone else? So you stayed married .... you still got a problem. There is room at the cross for you, Christian brothers and sisters.

'

I would wish to be among the humble and the contrite. Under the umbrella of God's grace where I can site the words of Jesus; "Has no one condemned you? ... 'No one.' she said. ... 'Then neither do I condemn you ... Go and sin no more.'"

'

"Go and sin no more?" How? I will not profess to have all the answers but I do know what God has done for me. I once asked God to help me to love him with an undivided heart. I will not lie. It hurt. Everything I have ever set my heart upon has broken it. Broken and bleeding I was finally able to rest in the love that will not let me go. But I still have scars. I'm still processing how to deeply love without the fear that I am slipping back into idolatry .... which I do since I haven't arrived. Loving makes me nervous because I've been broken so many times. But love is one of the fruits of the Spirit which means that God is the source of true love and that he can give it to us .... and perfect love drives out fear.

Lovers And Saints

My understanding of Christ as the Lover of my soul has landed me in trouble in the past. I try to treat the topic gently and without argument. Some cannot relate to the imagery. Perhaps being male is an inhibitor for some ... or abuse for others ... the existence of so much perversion .... the butt of obscene jokes .... the queer, the kinky. Sex has been so marred that we can scarce see it as it was intended. To understand the intent we need to ask the author and he would take us back to the beginning .... for much of what is now was not intended at the beginning.

'

For in the beginning he made them male and female .... one man and one woman charged with the duty to be fruitful and to multiply. The man was to love his wife and the woman was to respect her husband. That was the aphrodisiac .... love and respect. Could we imagine Romeo and Juliet taking a third into their marriage bed? Yet they did not live long enough to become bored, spiteful or arrogant in their union.

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Yet even if they had lived a full life able to forsake all others they would have been in danger of sucking each other dry. In truth there is a third party that should be involved in their marriage. This third, the author of their union, is there to fill their spiritual need so that they do not drain each other but remain fresh. He is there to ensure the purity of that union for what God has joined together let not man separate. If God is not the third person in the marriage something and someone surely will be. Go back to the beginning and to the original intent. Then from that vantage point see Jesus Lover of the soul.

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Does this offend you? Is it so funny? "My words are spirit .... the flesh counts for nothing." Yet there are many other metaphors in scripture ..... Father, brother, shepherd to name a few. Favor the one that speaks to you ... Father may not work for some. Again, because something has been lost in the translation or the original intent. Might I suggest that there is not a problem so much with the metaphor as with the perspective. Perhaps something needs to be healed and set right then the metaphor will no longer be a problem.

A Season Of Poetry

In the land of poetry, literature and art there is a language spoken. It is a language of metaphors. Oddly enough, one can usually tell if the author is male or female from the style. I have read books written where the main character was a man and the author a woman ... the woman speaking for a man came out a little soft ... and I have read books where the author was a man and the main character a woman .... the woman was some kind of juggernaut. It is the same in art. One can usually tell by the approach to the subject matter if the artist is male or female.

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One can also tell what opinion the author or artist has to the subject matter by the subtle use of language or slight stroke of the brush. A man painting a woman may depict her as an ideal or as an object of hatred. In poetry an oddly used word or metaphor captures our attention and evokes thought and emotion. Try this on;

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I have gone marking the atlas of your body

with crosses of fire

My mouth went across: a spider trying to hide.

In you, behind you, timid, driven by thirst.

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What feeling do you get? Are there any literary allusions? Are there any metaphors? Is this written by a man or a woman? I have my opinion. Shall I tell?

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Already I have the advantage because I know the author is Pablo Neruda. The metaphor that jumps at me is "spider" ... it is an unflattering way of speaking of himself .... he is a scittery little spider driven to be bold by his thirst that needs to suck his lover dry. I feel puzzled by the "crosses of fire" Makes me think of the KKK or maybe the crusades, conquest? Is she going to die or be some empty husk when he is done with her? The opening lines remind me of the animal kingdom and the male marking his territory ... so he is possessive too. This is my initial response. If I were to talk to Pablo or go to a literary class I might learn more.

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There is a problem with metaphors .... they explain but also confuse. They are a poetic and beautiful tool .... that gives you a partial glimpse or picture of reality. You need to talk to the author or be instructed to understand. I have written some poetry and I can tell you about my poetry. It helps to know your bible .... folks who are familiar with scripture will recognize the allusions and may actually enjoy putting together the puzzle pieces of what my poem is about.

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In The Widow's Offering I reflect on the sacrifice of Christ and how I am called to follow in his footsteps. I hesitate. I think that is the moment captured in the painting above ... that moment of hesitation .... "God are you serious? You want my two pennies?" The reference to the widow is the story of the woman who put all she had in the offering plate .... it was two pennies. Jesus said she had given more than all the rest because she had given out of her poverty. The poem ends with the hope of heaven and the restoration of all things. So why don't I just say that? Because then there would be one less poem. Here it is;''

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The Widow's Offering

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Last fall the pirate wind snatched

the leaves from the maple in the

yard, and in trampling triumph

danced a dirge upon the garden

path. My tree, bare branched

against a purple sky all glory

spent, is a silent testament.

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I in my cap and coat protected

from the winds sharp tongue and

icy finger point, turn from the

blood trail. Reproached by all that

is mine in hearth and home,

purchased contentment not my

own but given, my coldness thaws

to prick my eyes and turn my step.

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Though now the widow winter

weeps and earth bereaved lies

silent under shroud of snow. I

watch and wait for breath and

sprout of spring to crown the

thorny hedgerows of the way with

bursts of fragrant flowering, as

earth and sky have wedding day

and all that's lost returns again.

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~Melanie Bird