In Not Of

Like my poetry, blogging helps me sort things out. And I go back and read my own stuff because I forget ... I rarely change much once I've finished posting except for the occasional typo or grammatical error .... which I'm sure there are plenty .... One of my common errors is to switch "there" and "their" .... of course the spell check does not catch that one. It's a lot like reading music and trying to hit all the notes right. I have to proof read and tweak .... make sure the information is accurate and that my intentions are not misunderstood.

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Besides writing I am in the minority of folk that likes public speaking. My eyes kind of light up when someone hands me a microphone all though I generally don't initiate these occasions. Everyone likes a good listener and listening is important. But if I do get a microphone you will listen because I will make you listen and because you will sense the urgency of what I have to tell you and I will compel your interest.

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There (or is that "their"... Hah!) so you have learned a little bit more about me. If I were to go on it would be self indulgent. In previous posts I have identified myself as a saint and a sinner. Just as I do not spend my time in foolish boasting I do not spend it in dishing up the dirt on wayward youth. These things have been repented of and God only sees me as his own dear child. I am forgiven, older and wiser yet still a sinner. Being honest about yourself does not mean that you have to walk around naked to please the perverse curiosity of strangers. I try to deal kindly with others so that I may treat myself with equal kindness. By all means make amends where ever you can but do not sit woefully in your pig pen .... lift your head and square your shoulders. You are the apple of his eye.

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As his dear children, who have not yet finished our race and entered into glory, we are still the object of Satan's great hatred. We will find ourselves battling against the world the flesh and the devil. Against such constant pressures we may stumble forward and sometimes backwards. There is no temptation that has seized you which is not common to man. If we fall back it is likely that it will only increase our desire for holiness .... sin and it's consequences are much like drinking sour milk ... we want to spit it out. And sin takes it's toll on the body. But to live this holy, healthy life ... to be in this (sinful) world but not of it, we need armour ... we need protection and God knows this and has no intention that we be like naked babes exposed to the elements. He surrounds and clothes us with his presence. I will not leave you as orphans ..... never will I leave you, never will I forsake you .... my mother and father may forsake me but the Lord will receive me.

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In a previous post I spoke of a desire for kingdom come. Kingdom comes first to men's hearts but it doesn't stop there. It flows outward like a glorious river .... oh the deep deep love of Jesus that refreshes all the land. We are working towards kingdom come. So for now we are in the world but we are not of this world .... we are of the kingdom, subjecting every thought to Christ ... asking for and receiving the mind of Christ ... asking and receiving the fruits of the Spirit. Making a wholesome difference in this world. Ushering in the kingdom.

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Such lofty ideals. Yet here we are with our feet on the ground or in the mud rubbing shoulders with obnoxious people. We are in community but sometimes we think we would be holier sitting on a mountain top somewhere with God 24/7. And we need those times alone with him to get our heads on straight but then we have to come down off the mountain and live with the real people who have the real problems. And attitudes are contagious. It's like someone with the flu sneezing on you and now you are sick too. Foolish behavior draws derision .... hatred butts up against hatred ,... and seduction precedes immorality. There are spiritual forces at work in choreographed attack formations trying to take you out. Not that we should fear but that we would be armed with a little knowledge and preparation.

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If a Christian person contagious with the wrong sort of attitude advances on you, you have every right to move away from them. It is a rebuke to them to get their house in order so that they may live in Christian community. Details on this instruction is found in scripture along with the charge to pray for one another. This teaching does not apply to unbelievers. It is problematic for a believer to enter into partnership with unbelievers in marriage or even business since their values clash and a believer may be forced to compromise. While there is a special bond that we celebrate in the family of God, every man is our neighbor to love as we love ourselves. And we love with the love of the Lord.

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But in this world Satan holds sway. Understanding his devices gives you a heads up and helps you check thoughts and attitudes at the door. You do not have to own or feel guilty about every thought that comes into your head. We are tempted and tried at every turn and temptation is no sin. If you yield to temptation in agreement of thought or actions then you have sinned. If Satan cannot get you to agree with him he will find other ways to provoke you. This attack may come through a relationship or a physical infirmity. Curb the angry and stressed response and begin to praise and thank the Father. Let God arise and his enemies be scattered! Your peace will increase and frustrations will subside, kingdom comes, the Spirit surrounds you, you own the atmosphere of heaven, Zion stands and ... Satan retreats. You will walk from glory unto glory. Further out and further in to joy.

Young Man

When I was a young child I was inspired to write a War of the Worlds Sci Fi script. I think the only deviation from the rather well known plot is that the aliens were giant killer crabs. So I dug out my little black and white composition book .... the one you buy at the Acme, and scribbled out my story. I was, however, somewhat stymied for an ending. How would good triumph over evil and how do you kill a giant killer crab? My auntie happened to be in the seat next to me so I asked her ..... "How do you kill crabs?" ... "Well I guess you drop them in boiling water." she replied. The wind quickly went out of my sales .... it seemed a rather lame ending for my story. Giant killer crabs are obviously too big for stock pots and running around dousing them with boiling water somehow fell short of a dramatic conclusion. I laid my story aside.

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Another dream bites the dust. We start out really inspired and then end on a note of disappointment. We lay the dream aside. But it doesn't have to be that way. I don't know about you but I pray a lot. I figure that I need all the help I can get. But I don't always win .... I don't always succeed .... and I sometimes fail. When I fail or fall short of genius I tend to quibble a bit with God ..... "Did I not ask you to help me with this?" .... "Why did you put me in this situation when you knew it was over my head!?!" .... "Why did you make me like this?" .... "Why did you let this happen to me?"

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I quibble because my initial response is to feel that God .... who claims to be my friend .... has somehow betrayed me. I feel stung .... "thought me and God were partners!" It is a response I am learning to check. Because I can ask him, "Why?" ..... and if I listen he gives me the most beautiful reasons and in the end all I can do is fall down in gratitude and praise. Dear reader, I do not know your situation ..... but could it be that "if I never had a problem I would not know that God could solve them".... or that my sins and disapointments have brought me to my knees in humility and with a renewed compassion for the struggles of others ... or that it was necessary for me to know that I am a very great sinner so that I may know that Christ is a very great Savior?

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And what of our griefs? I tell you the truth, there is nothing that God has taken away from one of his children or asked them to give up that he will not replace with the better or give back to them many times over. This I know. It is a promise. It is scripture. Be comforted.

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So, dear reader, like all the rest you have failed. You may be at the place where you believe some kind of change is in order. Here I can repeat the gospel message to you of the sacrifice of Christ and the forgiveness of sins, and this is our foundation. But we still have a problem in our flesh .... our soul is willing .... our flesh is weak and compromised. We have a dream but we do not see how it can be realized. Our body is not evil but it can be in bondage .... keeping us from doing the things we want to do. All solutions seem rather lame and we fall short of glory. We are ready to drop out of the race. The Apostle Paul owned this very problem .... we are in good company. But only because Paul recognized this problem as something he did not want .... he wanted a cure and he persevered in God's grace and never laid his dream aside.

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We all want a cure. When people start recognizing that we have a problem because our actions reflect more of the drunkard then of a man getting the job done (Pro. 31: 1-9) ... we want a cure. God is the answer to our flesh as well as to our soul, mind, and emotions. "Do you not know that you are God's temple and that God's Spirit dwells in you? If anyone destroys God's temple, God will destroy him. For God's temple is holy and you are that temple." (1 Cor. 3:16) .... in other Scriptures we are told that this temple was not meant for sexual immorality but for the Lord. Sexual immorality is idolatry like any addiction. The abomination that causes desolation has entered the temple. Lust sits on the throne of God which is our heart.... this is why we cannot walk the line. Yet we may repent and ask for the Spirit and an undivided heart. Yes it hurts. But for the joy set before us we can endure. Freedom waits. Let God do his work in us. Our perfection will consumate in glory. The alternative is destruction.

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Mihereta Yesus I*

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When your feet in wayward walking

pleasure seeker, boastful talking.

Did God's face seem cold and stern,

an angry fire, judgment burn?

Causing love lost thirsty search,

drain the cup but never quench.

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When you turn in desperation

listen for the voice that calls

for the sinner, celebration,

when he on the mercy falls.

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You are chosen as a son.

Swiftly in obedience run,

For the wind is at your back

Power pulls you down the track.

Losing self, gainful action,

You have found your satisfaction.

~Melanie Bird

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Then the fire of the Lord fell and burned up the sacrifice, --

When the people saw this, they fell prostrate and cried,

"The Lord - he is God! The Lord - he is God!" ...

And Elijah said to Ahab, "Go, eat and drink for there is the sound of a

heavy rain." ... Elijah climbed to the top of Carmel,

bent down to the ground and put his face between his knees ...

Meanwhile, the sky grew black with clouds, the wind rose, a heavy rain

came on and Ahab rode off to Jezreel. The power of the Lord came

upon Elijah and, tucking his cloak into his belt, he ran ahead of Ahab

all the way to Jezreel. (I Kings 18: 16-45)

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I will bless you O Lord!.. I will bless you O Lord! For you have made man. In your own image you have made man. A little lower then the angels you have made man. When we look at his brow we see that you have crowned him with glory .... his shoulders with strength .... he has the arms for protection and hands meant to work, provide and love.God crown him with your love and mercy. Uphold him when he is weak and tired. Lead him in the way he is to go. Let him love your law. Forgive him when he falls. Comfort him when he feels ashamed. Establish the work of his hands, yes establish the work of his hands.

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Construction Zone

(Written during the Construction of the New High School)

Spring 2005

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The columns and beams bolted together, the ironwork for the new school,

Formed three grey crosses as you looked at it from

The window of the old school dispensation.

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At the top of one column, an iron worker perched,

Lining up the beams to support

The weight of white in coming winters.

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Suddenly, a rusted bulldozer belching smoke

Hit a footer, and with an angry growl

Knocked the sturdy column.

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The worker felt the jolt

Grabbed the rugged column at the cross

While the whole structure shuddered.

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He froze in fear.

Envisioning falling free,

His fardels following.

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Then he laughed,

Yelled an imprecation

At the beast below.

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12 o'clock.

Hanging his bag of bolts

On a spike in arms reach,

He came down

singing to his rest.

~David Bird

*Mihereta Yesus is Ethiopian for The Compassion of Jesus. It was the name of the mission hospital where my mother and father-in-law Herbert & Mary Bird served as missionaries.

O Love That Will Not Let Me Go

Okay, I did it. I defined my views on sex and marriage as being one man, one woman. Heretofore I have avoided this topic because I think that practicing homosexuals have become a scape goat in the Evangelical Christian Community. Like the woman caught in adultery there are folks pointing fingers and picking up rocks, ready to accuse those who have come out of the closet while they remain in there own.

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What I mean by that is, that I have had enough perversity and down right evil in my own thoughts, in my own lifetime, to realize that I live in a glass house and should not be pitching stones. And we have the rising divorce rate to prove all is not well in the Christian Community. Is there pedophilia behind the desire for the ever younger? Can you be married to the same person for 30 years and be thinking about someone else? So you stayed married .... you still got a problem. There is room at the cross for you, Christian brothers and sisters.

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I would wish to be among the humble and the contrite. Under the umbrella of God's grace where I can site the words of Jesus; "Has no one condemned you? ... 'No one.' she said. ... 'Then neither do I condemn you ... Go and sin no more.'"

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"Go and sin no more?" How? I will not profess to have all the answers but I do know what God has done for me. I once asked God to help me to love him with an undivided heart. I will not lie. It hurt. Everything I have ever set my heart upon has broken it. Broken and bleeding I was finally able to rest in the love that will not let me go. But I still have scars. I'm still processing how to deeply love without the fear that I am slipping back into idolatry .... which I do since I haven't arrived. Loving makes me nervous because I've been broken so many times. But love is one of the fruits of the Spirit which means that God is the source of true love and that he can give it to us .... and perfect love drives out fear.

Lovers And Saints

My understanding of Christ as the Lover of my soul has landed me in trouble in the past. I try to treat the topic gently and without argument. Some cannot relate to the imagery. Perhaps being male is an inhibitor for some ... or abuse for others ... the existence of so much perversion .... the butt of obscene jokes .... the queer, the kinky. Sex has been so marred that we can scarce see it as it was intended. To understand the intent we need to ask the author and he would take us back to the beginning .... for much of what is now was not intended at the beginning.

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For in the beginning he made them male and female .... one man and one woman charged with the duty to be fruitful and to multiply. The man was to love his wife and the woman was to respect her husband. That was the aphrodisiac .... love and respect. Could we imagine Romeo and Juliet taking a third into their marriage bed? Yet they did not live long enough to become bored, spiteful or arrogant in their union.

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Yet even if they had lived a full life able to forsake all others they would have been in danger of sucking each other dry. In truth there is a third party that should be involved in their marriage. This third, the author of their union, is there to fill their spiritual need so that they do not drain each other but remain fresh. He is there to ensure the purity of that union for what God has joined together let not man separate. If God is not the third person in the marriage something and someone surely will be. Go back to the beginning and to the original intent. Then from that vantage point see Jesus Lover of the soul.

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Does this offend you? Is it so funny? "My words are spirit .... the flesh counts for nothing." Yet there are many other metaphors in scripture ..... Father, brother, shepherd to name a few. Favor the one that speaks to you ... Father may not work for some. Again, because something has been lost in the translation or the original intent. Might I suggest that there is not a problem so much with the metaphor as with the perspective. Perhaps something needs to be healed and set right then the metaphor will no longer be a problem.

A Season Of Poetry

In the land of poetry, literature and art there is a language spoken. It is a language of metaphors. Oddly enough, one can usually tell if the author is male or female from the style. I have read books written where the main character was a man and the author a woman ... the woman speaking for a man came out a little soft ... and I have read books where the author was a man and the main character a woman .... the woman was some kind of juggernaut. It is the same in art. One can usually tell by the approach to the subject matter if the artist is male or female.

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One can also tell what opinion the author or artist has to the subject matter by the subtle use of language or slight stroke of the brush. A man painting a woman may depict her as an ideal or as an object of hatred. In poetry an oddly used word or metaphor captures our attention and evokes thought and emotion. Try this on;

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I have gone marking the atlas of your body

with crosses of fire

My mouth went across: a spider trying to hide.

In you, behind you, timid, driven by thirst.

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What feeling do you get? Are there any literary allusions? Are there any metaphors? Is this written by a man or a woman? I have my opinion. Shall I tell?

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Already I have the advantage because I know the author is Pablo Neruda. The metaphor that jumps at me is "spider" ... it is an unflattering way of speaking of himself .... he is a scittery little spider driven to be bold by his thirst that needs to suck his lover dry. I feel puzzled by the "crosses of fire" Makes me think of the KKK or maybe the crusades, conquest? Is she going to die or be some empty husk when he is done with her? The opening lines remind me of the animal kingdom and the male marking his territory ... so he is possessive too. This is my initial response. If I were to talk to Pablo or go to a literary class I might learn more.

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There is a problem with metaphors .... they explain but also confuse. They are a poetic and beautiful tool .... that gives you a partial glimpse or picture of reality. You need to talk to the author or be instructed to understand. I have written some poetry and I can tell you about my poetry. It helps to know your bible .... folks who are familiar with scripture will recognize the allusions and may actually enjoy putting together the puzzle pieces of what my poem is about.

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In The Widow's Offering I reflect on the sacrifice of Christ and how I am called to follow in his footsteps. I hesitate. I think that is the moment captured in the painting above ... that moment of hesitation .... "God are you serious? You want my two pennies?" The reference to the widow is the story of the woman who put all she had in the offering plate .... it was two pennies. Jesus said she had given more than all the rest because she had given out of her poverty. The poem ends with the hope of heaven and the restoration of all things. So why don't I just say that? Because then there would be one less poem. Here it is;''

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The Widow's Offering

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Last fall the pirate wind snatched

the leaves from the maple in the

yard, and in trampling triumph

danced a dirge upon the garden

path. My tree, bare branched

against a purple sky all glory

spent, is a silent testament.

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I in my cap and coat protected

from the winds sharp tongue and

icy finger point, turn from the

blood trail. Reproached by all that

is mine in hearth and home,

purchased contentment not my

own but given, my coldness thaws

to prick my eyes and turn my step.

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Though now the widow winter

weeps and earth bereaved lies

silent under shroud of snow. I

watch and wait for breath and

sprout of spring to crown the

thorny hedgerows of the way with

bursts of fragrant flowering, as

earth and sky have wedding day

and all that's lost returns again.

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~Melanie Bird

I Had A Dream/ Prologue

Last night God asked me if I would give up this life for him. I hesitated thinking of the pain .... "I will be with you ... and staying will be harder" he said .... "Then yes" .... I felt the presence of angels bringing me to a place. I felt God's joy and welcome. I looked down at the city of Jerusalem. It glowed a soft golden light. It was in a valley surrounded by black hills. There was evil in the hills but it was not allowed to enter the city .... "Zion stands by hills surrounded" I thought.

Then I was given a new name, Ophelia Olivia Agnes .... I was told that my old name was something I had left behind in my past life and that I would not use it anymore. At this point I saw Jesus walking toward me holding a little girl by the hand. She was excited. She clapped her hands and ran toward me to hug me. It was Giselle. I looked up to see if my grandparents were there. They waved from a distance but were patiently waiting for my parents. I wanted to inquire after others but it was not for me to see. I felt the peace of Christ all around me. It was the atmosphere .... the people I saw laughed frequently and seemed care free.

Giselle and I talked. She said she had been waiting for me ... she remembered her life on earth ... that it was hot in my tummy and she was little. Things were better here. I asked Jesus what her name was ... he said Ingrid Giselle Ophelia .... she shares my new name. She looked up at me with awe and wonder. I asked him why she was the age of a child and Jesus told me that all infants that die grow to a certain age. She looked about 6. He also described her as artistic and musical. I told Giselle I was trying to adopt two little girls. She processed the information and then was excited to have sisters. Finally Jesus said it was time to go. Giselle called back that she would wait for me. Then she laughed and did a cartwheel. Jesus shut a large pair of double doors and I could see them no more. I had been crying .... I woke up crying. I am still crying on and off. Not because I am sad .... it was just all so emotional. Jesus is still with me and I can see Giselle in my minds eyeI looked up Ophelia Olivia Agnes .... Ophelia is Greek and means "help", Olivia is Latin for an "olive tree" a symbol of grace and fruitfulness. An olive branch is the symbol for peace. Agnes is from the Greek also and means "pure" or "chaste" or "holy" and the symbol for that name is the lamb. I think my nick name might be "Liv"! So here is a verse; Now in a great house there are not only vessels of gold and silver but also of wood and clay, some for honorable use some for dishonorable. Therefore if anyone cleanses himself from what is dishonorable he will be a vessel for honorable use, set apart as holy, useful to the master of the house, ready for every good work." (2 Timothy: 20)

I told God that for however long I remain that I want to own the atmosphere of heaven to get me through. And he keeps me singing. So what do you think? Is it a pretty dream? Is any of it true? I have my own opinion. But I hope you are encouraged dear reader.

At last the march shall end, the wearied ones shall rest,
The pilgrims find their Father's house, Jerusalem the blest. ~Arthur Messiter

Many, O Lord my God, are thy wonderful works which thou hast done, and thy thoughts which are us-ward: they cannot be reckoned up in order unto thee: if I would declare and speak of them, they are more than can be numbered. (Psa. 40)

*The illustration above is entitled Ophelia

Among The Weeds

I have just come in from the yard where I have been pruning and weeding and harvesting. There have been various prickers and unruly branches growing every which way but there is also a glut of butternut squash ... enough to share and take us into the winter maybe.

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I have no pumpkins this year. They did not tolerate the midsummer drought. The one lone pumpkin has become a squirrel snack. I wish now that I had hedged it. There was poison ivy too. Before I sat down to write to you I scrubbed with Burt's Bees Brown Soap .... but knowing that will not be enough I have also started myself on Rhus Tox. It is the most potent and homeopathic medication I know for poison ivy cure.

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In previous posts I have described negative thoughts as the grubs that eat the tender shoots in my garden. The only sane thing to do is crush them as they are the beginning of destruction. To entertain negative thoughts is to rot the mind and then the body. Evil thoughts are a plague. The Holy Spirit is the cure.

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But too often we are over extended. We have a long to do list and we are busy burning the candle at both ends. If we do not stop to worship and allow God to take care of us mentally, emotionally and physically ...... well, like the garden, our mind seems to choke with weeds and we move towards becoming more of a problem then a help. We move around in this world rubbing shoulders with other sinners .... acting out and reacting to each other. Perhaps we are helping other people clean up some things in their lives .... how do you keep from reacting in superiority or pride to "the mess others are in" .... how do you keep from coming down with your own case of something. Like brown soap and rhus tox time with Jesus will keep you sane and healthy.

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God knows what is going to come against me every day. The hymns and scriptures I read and pray daily are a buffer against the onslaught. Often I feel the prayers of others .... THANK YOU! They have been fervent and effectual. God bless you too.

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I could suggest that we think only pleasant thoughts of one another but you might take that as a rather naive view of the state of the world ... and I've thought about this ... Here are some of the thoughts of God that are us ward .... "I love you ... I died for you ... you are mine ..." We may think this way of each other. God loves you .... he died for you .... you belong to him. I intend to keep this in mind as I watch your back. "Little children let us love one another"..."pray for your enemies".

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I do find that so much of the battle is in my mind .... it is not what people have said or done to me, as me thinking that I think I know what they are thinking .... or just a casual wondering .... something someone says or does piques my curiosity. Just the wondering seems to set off all kinds of speculations that seem to digress rapidly to the gutter. More then I needed to know! More then I want to know! Is it possible to be a busy body in your mind? How do I shut this off or turn the channel! I have found that prayer seems to abruptly change the atmosphere from open sewer to kingdom come. God knows every situation and I can lift my concerns to him if anything is amiss he is the one to fix it.